And so, dear reader, refreshed from our half-time orange and cup of tea and - as necessary - hairdryer treatment if you had a particularly poor first half, we embark on races 13 through 18.
Now I have to concede to being a traditionalist, and the third day of Cheltenham I am afraid, for me, is not a Championship Festival day of racing. Rather, its an excuse for bookies to bleed money from punters and for the racecourse to squeeze another 70,000 people into a (very large) grandstand shaped phonebox.
I will tell you now that most of my week’s punting action will have concluded by the close of the first half, and tomorrow (Thursday) will be a day of drinking and celebrating / commiserating the action from the first two days. However, though a traditionalist, I am also a confirmed gambling addict. And, as such, will be having ‘interest bets’ on the races tomorrow.
For what its worth, here’s my view:
2.00 Novices Handicap Chase - three words, three reasons not to bet. Lots of 1’s, 2’s and 3’s in the form and lots of unexposed horses. If you can forgive him bad run last time, Flintoff might be a topical winner with England about to pull on the pads for the start of the Cricket World Cup. Ladbrokes are offering 33/1, which strikes me as value in an impossible race. Prior to disappointing last time, he won two on the bounce on heavy ground. He’s a dodgy jumper who may not like the ground and might have too much weight, and yet - in this race - he’s still the one for me!
I’m going to take another one to give me an interest in the race after ‘Freddie’s’ possible early bath, and that one is King’s Advocate from the Tom Taaffe yard.He has decent form in Ireland and was a predictably staying on third last time over two miles. He wants the longer trip and shouldn’t mind the ground. In a wide open race, he could make the frame.
I always look for Ferdy Murphy in Cheltenham handicap chases (two last year, and 50/1 Joes Edge yesterday should mean you are looking for him too!), and he has L’Antartique in here off an attractive weight. This one was beaten only two lengths by Dom D’Orgeval last time and, by the time you read this (if the Sun Alliance has been run), that may look top class form. He sneaks in here off 10-11 and the 33/1 about his chance is surely too big.
2.35 A Grade 2 in name only. Lots of horses who would have been beaten in the Championship races have swerved into this affair. There are a couple of decent sticks in here who, in fairness, probably need two and a half miles rather than two or three miles.
Monet’s Garden is definitely swerving the big guns after running so brilliantly against Voy Por Ustedes in the Arkle last year, and could win this. But he’s not for me after dodging the big boys.
Our Vic probably has the best level of form in the race, and could easily win. I will definitely be having a saver on him. But for me, I’m going to look to a little each way value in the shape of the progressive Racing Demon.
Trained by triple Gold Cup-winning handler, Mrs Terry Biddlecombe (you might know her as Henrietta Knight), this beastie was impressive at Huntingdon in their big chase of the season, the Peterborough, before falling when favourite for a hot little handicap hurdle last time out.
Assuming he’s no worse for the experience, I reckon he’s a place good thing. There are a series of other intermediate type animals here, most of whom it may be unfair to crab for going for this race.
However, I like crabbing, and I will drink to Racing Demon reaching the frame and, with a bit of luck, troubling the judge for the gold medal position.
3.15 Thank Heavens for the Ladbrokes World Hurdle! A true championship race, and one full of intrigue to boot! The wheels fell off the previously invincible Black Jack Ketchum last time out, when the heavy ground was blamed for his inability to maintain the series of 1’s by his name.
I am prepared to believe that he had an off day. However, saying that, I still don’t feel that his form merits him being a 9/4 favourite for this race. He’s sure to travel like a dream, but - as you may know already - I like to know what a horse finds off the bridle. When he was asked to find last time, the tank was empty. One paced may be a harsh observation, especially when that one pace is 5th gear, but this guy doesn’t appear to have an overdrive.
So, to the contenders: shortlist for me is Blazing Bailey, Inglis Drever, Kasbah Bliss and Mighty Man. I’d throw in Asian Maze too if she runs, but suspect she’ll be having a rest tomorrow. (I know these are the next four in the betting, but that’s because they’re most likely to win!)
I am a huge fan of Blazing Bailey, who bids to reaffirm the form of the Triumph Hurdle of last year, after Detroit City’s poor run in the Champion Hurdle and Fair Along’s creditable second in the Arkle. However, huge fan as I am, it will still be a tremendous effort to beat his olders in this race. I’ve backed him already but will be taking another against the field.
Inglis Drever is game and consistent and is a previous winner of this race, but I just have a nagging doubt that he will find at least one of these too good.
From France, Kasbah Bliss represents the multiple-Stayers Hurdle winning team of Francois Doumen (remember the magnificent Baracouda?), so there will be no questions unanswered about whether this horse is good enough. Douman is bordering on genius status for me, and rarely goes home from the Festival empty-handed. Kasbah Bliss gave a stone and more to the three horses who beat him last time out, and racing on even terms here must have a big shout.
Nonetheless, I will reluctantly say ‘non’ to this one, and pitch my punting tent firmly in the Mighty Man camp. Possibly the forgotten horse of the race, he has rock solid form credentials, and the ground has definitely come right for him. He’s currently trading at around 6/1 on betfair and this represents excellent value in my opinion. So its the Man to be Mighty for Matty!
4.00 After the brief excursion into top drawer equine exertion, we revert to the pony club stuff with the Racing Post Plate (A Handicap Chase). The name says it all. THE World Hurdle. A handicap chase. I will be drunk by this point (not really, mum!) and, depending on how the previous race pans out, may get stuck into one here…
Opera Mundi is the name. At a best priced 9/2 in a 24 runner handicap chase, its not exactly banker material. But the horse looks potentially top class and gets plenty of weight concessions from some of the older, more established and more exposed runners, notably stable companion Armaturk, who has to lug 11-12 round.
There are very few unexposed horses in opposition, and it might be stablemate Nycteos who gives the selection the biggest headache. He’s had one run this year, a couple of weeks ago, and will be ready enough for this.
Good luck if you’re playing here - as I’ve referred to previously, I am not especially good at finding winners in Festival Handicaps.
4.40 Hahaha. Brace yourselves, ladies and gentlemen, for the annual carnage that is twenty overzealous amateurs trying to cajole their inexperienced steeds to jump the 27 fences, spanning over four miles, of the 137th Year of the National Hunt Chase Challenge Cup (Amateur Riders’ Novices’ Chase). A long title, and one littered with reasons to go to the bar / toilet / kitchen. You should get paid out if your horse gets round in this race!
No matter. To possible winners: Gungadu is clearly the best horse in the race and has the Captain on board (that’s Jamie Snowden to you, he can ride a horse) and must have the best chance. But he’s 11/8. 11/8!!! In a field of 20 knackers! If he can swerve the enveloping pandemonium, he should be made Sergeant bloody Major!
So I’ll chance my arm with a couple of rags, much more in hope than expectation.
R H Alner (a good Dorset man like myself) is a decent enough trainer of stayers, and he has Miko de Beauchene in here. He wouldn’t have the class of the ridiculously short priced favourite. But he will stay and is a much more tempting speculative wager. At 14’s with Stan James, he’s worth a tickle.
My other against the field is the massively unexposed Swift Thyne. He’s only had two runs and, as they say, could be anything. Well, not quite anything. He couldn’t be a cow for example. Or a toaster. He’s definitely a horse. And he might, just might, be able to give us a run for small money at 50/1.
One important point of order here, dear reader. This is a novices’ chase where most of the runners will fail to complete. DON’T BOTHER TO BET EACH WAY!!! Bet two horses to win, if you are tempted to bet each way.
[I am now braced for a stack of sob story emails about punters who were on the 2nd and 3rd horses at 100/1, but did them win only on my advice!]
5.20 The Get Out Stakes just doesn’t get any easier! This time we’re asked to contemplate the outcome of two dozen carefully campaigned hurdlers over three miles.
Perversely, another of my Grand National fancies runs here. The horse is Cloudy Bays, and its not unfancied. I couldn’t possibly back him for this race, but of course I hope for a big run. I’m on at over 300/1 incidentally for the Aintree biggie.
So who will win? Well, to be honest, “I’m sorry, I haven’t a clue!”.
I’m a big fan of Lennie Lungo, and he runs Monolith and previous winner Freetown. This is a race usually won by a big priced horse, and so I will reluctantly pass these two over, in favour of something with a less obvious chance.
Way way down the lists, you will find two nags called Ostfanni and Arrayou. I don’t know much about either of them, except that they will be big prices and generally run consistently. This race, unlike the last, is a race to play each way in, and I put these two up as sporting tickets against the field.
After this is concluded, we will have reached the end of the third day. Many of us will be gasping for air, and cursing the fact that the meeting now runs into a fourth day.
But, oh boy!, what a fourth day. Triumph Hurdle, Gold Cup, comedy Foxhunters, County Hurdle and lots more besides. Bring it on!